Emily describes herself as an Irish goth who loves makeup. She has Asperger’s Syndrome and suffers from other physical and mental health conditions which greatly affect her quality of life. Here, she speaks in more depth about the kinds of medications she has been prescribed and how she takes them, while also looking at their side effects and faults and how they compare with cannabis. Twitter: @lilithlunalou
Hi again! How many prescribed medications do you take on a typical day?
I’ve been on numerous medications throughout the years. Mostly opiate-based medication, like Tylex, OxyNorm and antibiotics. I was prescribed things like Olanzapine, Seroquel, Risperidone. I can’t remember the rest, unfortunately.
Do you believe the medications improve your quality of life overall?
Most of them made me worse or didn’t do anything at all.
Do you believe your medications have been prescribed carefully (i.e. not over-prescribed)?
I was over-prescribed many times, especially when I was in hospital. No-one was on half the medication I was on. I couldn’t wake up and function. I could only sleep and drool, that’s all I was fit to do. The nurses would try to get me out of bed. I would try and I’d walk through the hallway, leaning against the walls for support as I walked.
Does purchasing those prescribed meds cost you a lot?
It used to, till I got my medical card.
How do your medications affect you? Are there any in particular which stand out in terms of side effects, or a lack of efficacy?
I’m only on one prescription at the moment and that’s my depot of Paliperidone. I’m lucky that this one doesn’t make you drowsy, however it does cause weight gain. As a result, my ankles and legs are swollen with water retention and so is most of my body. Walking can feel like walking on glass or pebbles.
Which of your prescribed medications work best?
None have worked for me. They’ve caused more problems than help. Cannabis is the only thing that’s worked for me.
How would you compare the effects of the antipsychotics with the antidepressants? Do they work well together?
No, as you end up getting triple the amount of side effects.
Are there any Irish CBD products you’ve tried and particularly liked?
I haven’t tried any Irish brands. I have tried American and English brands, such as 2400mg of CBD Leaf oil, as well as 1500mg of CBD leaf vape juice. I’ve tried CBD flowers, such as Diesel and Great White Shark. Both were good. I’ve tried roll-on oil for back pain, which is good. The only problem is, it’s a small bottle. And you’ve to buy three or four, so you’re not panicking in a short period of time about when you can get the next bottle. Also, I must note, CBD does wonders for my sleep. I normally only get an hour’s sleep, if lucky, without cannabis. I sleep every night, at least for seven or eight hours, when I use cannabis.
Do you believe cannabis has any benefits in particular for someone with Asperger’s Syndrome?
My partner and grandad noticed I socialise better. I’m able to hold a conversation without going into too much detail and going into overload. I don’t panic or stress as much as I used to over basic tasks. This does depend on the CBD product and what strain I’m using.
When did your partner start using cannabis for pain relief? Late twenties.
What sort of pain does cannabis help your partner with?
All strains do wonders for my partner. I’ve seen him without it for a couple of weeks. He was coming home from work, barely able to walk. All he was able for was lying in bed or sitting on the couch. He had to take time off of work. seeing him like that broke my heart.
Do you and your partner ever feel unsafe getting cannabis in Ireland, due to its general illegality? Yes.
And why do you feel unsafe?
Having to source it by a drug dealer, instead of buying it from a legal and regulated source. The fact that it’s criminalised is a huge factor as to why it’s unsafe. When you’re getting it from a dealer you don’t know what strain it is, what THC or CBD levels are in it. You don’t know if it’s been chemically grown or sprayed.
How does using cannabis help with your eating disorder?
Increases appetite, reduces nausea and vomiting. It also relaxes me to the point where now, I can actually do more research into finding out more about it. It also gets rid of my body dysmorphia. I don’t see myself as obese, the way I do when I’ve no CBD in my system.
How would you describe Schizophrenia to other people?
It’s seeing/hearing/smelling/feeling things that aren’t there.
Do you experience the symptoms of it often?
Every day I experience symptoms. The intensity of it varies from day to day. When I’m relaxed or feeling normal, it’s not as bad. It only got worse when I was on prescribed medication. On the box of some of these meds, in small print, it said: “May cause anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts”. We weren’t told this, so it was until it was too late and my partner read the box that we realised why I got so bad. Since being off those kinds of medications, I’m stabilising. The symptoms usually ease as you get older. When I was in my late teens to early twenties, it was really bad. As I’m getting older and doing a lot of mental work on myself with the help of cannabis, my symptoms aren’t all day every day, like before. Now that my body isn’t constantly fighting physical pain, I can tackle my mental pain head on! I get symptoms every day, but it’s not as scary as people think. What I experience is spiritual, not in a religious way.
Can you elaborate on why the experience feels spiritual for you? I would rather not answer.
Do you feel, personally, that cannabis affects your Schizophrenia?
No. The only time it affected me badly was when I was scared to use it. Once I let go of my fear, it really started to help. Also, it’s like any medication. There are many strains. It will take time to find one that suits everything. However, even the cannabis that didn’t suit me 100% was better than any prescribed medication I’ve been on.
Do you believe cannabis helps with Bipolar Disorder?
Cannabis has multiple benefits for multiple ailments. I think it can help with all mental illnesses, including helping with physical ailments. Cannabis has helped me with all my ailments, from my head to toes. We all have the receptors in our bodies for this plant. Bipolar is an imbalanced level of emotions. Cannabis relaxes patients with mental health issues; it quietens the mind. If the mind is quietened and it’s relaxed, emotions will level out also, as a result.
Thanks again for chatting with me Emily, all the best!